Last night, looking through an old photo album for a particular picture, I found one I had seen many times of me and my mom on the day in 1975 when I brought our first son home from the hospital.
Looking at this picture, I have a new understanding of the Scripture,
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things, for now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I am known. And now abide faith, hope and love, these three; but the greatest of these is love."
~1 Corinthians 13:11-13
I always knew my mom loved me and I always loved her, but it wasn't until two weeks before she died, after suffering for years from the aftermath of a debilitating stroke, that I received her blessing. Mind you the emphasis is on received. Through a Bible study I had been doing the Lord had revealed to me that I had a spirit of rejection in my life that was generational. It had to do with appreciating my femininity.
Jack prayed for me and got that nasty spirit out of me and I was a new person! Before, I was unable to receive Mom's love in the fullest, because of this spirit. After, I was blessed by her in a most powerful way. That is a story for another time, but last night I realized the blessing of her love in the picture that was so intense it took my breath away. I sat with the picture on my chest for hours, just holding it and soaking up her love.
In the picture, I am looking at the camera, but my mom is looking at me. I was stunned as I stared at it and realized I had never seen that aspect of the picture before! I had always been looking at myself and thinking how awful I looked. As I looked at it with new vision, I saw the truth of her love like I have never experienced in my life. There is such a big balloon of love being blown up in my heart, I almost feel like it will explode! It is sweetness personified.
But I have to say, as glorious as this new love I am feeling from my mom is, it is nothing compared to the revelation of the Lord it has given me. You see, when I was looking at myself in the snapshot, it was as looking in a mirror dimly. But when I looked at her, the Light went off! I see her face to face!
I see just how much she loved me! In the same way, as we get our eyes off of ourselves and how everything applies to us, and put our eyes on Jesus, the veil is ripped away and we see Him face to face. We no longer need to see in the mirror dimly. We no longer have to keep reflecting on ourselves, but we can look at Jesus. We can see His love being poured out for us over and over again! We are so loved! He adores us! We don't have to wait to die and go to heaven to experience Him face to face! Oh, Thank You, Lord!!
So may I encourage you, dear one, to look to Jesus? See Him as he spoke to the woman caught in adultery, not condemning but releasing her into freedom. See Him weeping over Jerusalem. See Him healing and delivering those in need. See Him being beaten for your diseases. Behold His face on the cross, looking out through time right into your eyes. Know He is there for you. He is gazing on you with love and adoration. Can you receive it? Blessings, Anna Marie
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